


gave me no compasses

by lux_et_astra



Series: invisible string [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:41:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26033605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lux_et_astra/pseuds/lux_et_astra
Summary: Clara reckons she might be her own soulmate.
Relationships: Ashildr | Lady Me/Clara Oswin Oswald
Series: invisible string [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1889722
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	gave me no compasses

Clara reckons she might be her own soulmate. That sounds incredibly narcissistic, and she knows anyone would laugh at her if she even suggested such a thing. But how else do you explain the word “me” written across her collar?

She’s resigned herself to lying. She wears shirts that cover her collar more often than not, and if anyone ever catches a glimpse of the word, she lies through her teeth and tells them it says Mike, or Mia, or Mitch.

Then she meets the Doctor, sees the names scrawled all over his pale skin, and realises maybe she doesn’t need to hide. She starts wearing normal T-shirts. She’s not afraid of him seeing parts of her she isn’t proud of.

The day she realises who her soulmate is is the day she dies.

She’d met Ashildr before, of course. She’d been young and happy and beautiful and Clara had fallen for her in seconds. Those sparkling blue eyes had reeled Clara in like a fish and never let her go. They hadn’t known each other for long — she tries to forget her — but when she closes her eyes, those beautiful blue eyes are a familiar sight.

She knows the Doctor’s met her again, and can’t help the flicker of regret that she’d been on a Year 10 school trip at the time. And there’s a room in the TARDIS specifically designated to tracking her movements. They tell themselves that it’s for surveillance, and maybe it is, but she knows the Doctor is more perceptive than he lets on. She thinks maybe he knows. And that’s why he subtly allows her access to the room — to show her that she’s safe, and okay, and alive. But of course, she’s always alive.

And then they meet. One final time. She’s cold and calculating and then she realises she’s not, she’s afraid and desperate and hopeful. And her name is Me. Clara tugs her shirt higher up her collar. It wouldn’t be helpful to reveal this now. On her way to her death, she takes her hand and squeezes it. Whispers, “I forgive you,” and taps her finger to her collar. Ashildr looks startled, and her fingers ghost up to her own collar. A tear trickles down her cheek. “I’m sorry.”

And she dies. And everything is over, and she’s never going to get the life she’d allowed herself to dream of for a second. But then she’s not, and everything is happening, and she finds herself in a TARDIS, functionally immortal, standing across the console from the girl she’d dreamed she’d get to spend her life with.

Ashildr — Me — takes the neck of her dress and pulls it over her collar bone. There, in Clara’s large, loopy handwriting, is her name, black against pale skin. Clara reveals her own — spiky, almost-runic letters spelling the two letters that have made her curious her entire life. They smile at each other, and look into each other’s eyes, and take off across the universe together. Hand in hand. 

They have eternity together. Clara has eternity with her soulmate. She squeezes Me’s hand and feels her heartbeat in the absence of her own.


End file.
